How to start better conversations

Most random chats end in the first five seconds. Usually it is not bad luck — it is a weak opening.

"Hi" is not an opener

"Hi" hands all the work to the other person. Give them something to answer instead:

• "What are you up to right now?"
• "What is the last thing you watched that you actually liked?"
• "Are you a morning person or is this a terrible time to be talking?"

Anything specific beats anything generic.

Ask questions that cannot be answered with one word

"Do you like music?" gets you "yes". "What is on repeat for you at the moment?" gets you a conversation. The second question also tells the other person you are actually listening.

Match the energy in front of you

If someone answers in short sentences, do not deliver a monologue. If they are enthusiastic, meet them there. Random chat is mostly a matching exercise, and reading the pace is half of it.

Have two or three things ready

You do not need a script, but knowing what you enjoy talking about helps: a show, a game, a hobby, a strong opinion about food. Anything you can talk about with interest will carry a conversation further than a question you do not care about.

Let a dead chat die

Some conversations do not work and that is fine. Say goodbye and skip. Being polite about it costs nothing and it makes the next one easier to start.